As this month starts arguably the most exciting time in any sport, March Madness, each week we will be selecting our “Final Four” of a specific movie/tv/music/comics topic. For the first installment, we’ve decided to pick our Final Four of Movie Villains.
Mark’s PicksEditor’s Note: The title specifically says Movie Villains, but because I know how much television Mark watches, I’ve allowed him to select a couple from TV. Also, he decided to throw in an Honorable Mention to further skirt the rules.
Auric Goldfinger, Goldfinger
The greatest Bond villain of all-time. I, mean come on, the man’s first name is a freaking pun. For a series full of great names, his is by far the best and most relevant to his movie. Not only is his name memorable, but he delivers the most famous (in my opinion) non-Bond line:
Bond: Do you expect me to talk?
Goldfinger: No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to die.
It also doesn’t hurt that Gert Frobe gives the best performance of any Bond villain — until Javier Bardem, of course.
Ivan Drago, Rocky IV
Let’s gets this out of the way first: Rocky is a trilogy. But, what about IV? Well, IV is a ridiculous, stand alone film where Rocky ends the Cold War. So, naturally it is the best boxing movie of all-time. It also produces the instantaneously recognizable, Ivan Drago. He has everything a villain should possess: He seems invincible, he has “evil” lines (“I must break you.”/ “If he dies, he dies.”), and he’s Eastern European. And as with most villains, our hero — Rocky — defies all odds and defeats him; even though, in boxing terms, they are not even in the same weight class. Also, there’s a training montage set the very 80s-tastic, “Hearts on Fire” by John Cafferty. Oh, did I mention that said montage is in the snow? Best. Movie. Ever.
Dan Scott, One Tree Hill
Ok, I’ll wait for you to stop laughing. All right, you good? Hear me out. Let’s eliminate all of the high school melodrama, and concentrate on only the Dan Scott segments, who is played to perfection by Paul Johansson. What is a characteristic of most villains? They cannot be killed early in the film/show no matter how hard our heroes try. Well, in the first four seasons of the show: Dan survived a heart attack, his car dealership being set on fire with him in it, and hanging himself in his jail cell. His most evil moments include: paying a hooker to be his brother’s fake girlfriend (she left him at the altar) and killing said brother. All the while doing anything he can to screw with lives of the main characters. Despite a final cop out at the end of the series that redeemed the character, Dan Scott will forever be one of the best written villains on TV.
Omar, The Wire
When the very mention of your name instills fear into every character on the show, you are a top of the line villain. If you haven’t seen the Wire, stop reading this post and go watch the Wire! I’ll wait… (one month later). Welcome back, and now that your life is forever changed — and you break out in panic sweats anytime someone says, “Omar Comin’ ” — I think you will agree with me, that on a show full of bad ass villains, Omar is by far the best.
Team Iceland, D2: The Mighty Ducks
It would be unfair to put an entire team on the list, but I think they are at least worth mentioning. Gunnar Stahl, Wolf Stansson and rest of the most randomly located evil hockey team in movie history were the first villains to enter my life. Even before watching Rocky IV, I wore out my D2 VHS tape so much that the line, “Gud Verk, Captain Duck,” has infiltrated my daily lexicon, and I will be forever grateful that Julie “the Cat” Gaffney figured out the triple deke.Follow Mark on Twitter and read his reviews on Off the Mark Thoughts